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Post by Rick Garcia on Feb 19, 2008 21:10:13 GMT -5
*hugs all around?*
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Post by alba on Feb 20, 2008 5:37:25 GMT -5
Aww, thanks Rick.
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Post by Spammich on Feb 20, 2008 5:58:59 GMT -5
<3
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Post by Clover on Feb 20, 2008 12:23:00 GMT -5
Jesus. We all need to take five minutes, step back from the computers, and eat a cookie. Seriously. Cause otherwise, it's just way too much of a downer.
Hugs, and cookies. Hugs. And. Cookies.
And sexy fun teims.
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Post by Rick Garcia on Feb 20, 2008 14:19:41 GMT -5
Haha. Maybe.
*hugs, cookies, etc.*
Sexy fun tiems, you say? I am intrigued.
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Post by Trey on Feb 20, 2008 16:59:15 GMT -5
Sorry I've been not posting, IRL I've been fairly busy and didn't have time to read big posts. T_T
*tackles Spammich* Aww I lurv Jo0! ^_^
Yeah, I am a monogamous person, as in, I only have sex with one person at a time. I pretty much stop sexual relations with one person for a bit, then find someone else. That was like, over the course of a year, though. I guess I'm also pretty insecure, and I kind of crush on guys easy. T_T;; I've gotten better now, though. In two ways, I don't crush as easy, and if I do, I ignore it for a while to see if I actually like them, or if I was just crushing.
But yeah, my ex I dated for about two months. No, I never loved him, but he really made me feel good and important, what can I say? When I found out how much he loved me, though, I had to break it off. I didn't like him as much, and I didn't want to hurt him more than I already would by waiting and breaking up with him later. Thinking back on it, no, I wouldn't change anything, but I really wish we were still friends. He stopped talking to me, understandably.
Anyways, I would never change any of my past. I think that all of it helped me be the person I am today. Yes, I can get a little bossy or snippy or mean, but for the most part, I think I am a rather well balanced person. I have good morals, and I like to think I handle situations well and with a rational mind.
Lets see, the first thing in my life that really happened was when I was seven. My mom, dad, brother and I lived in a two story house, so we had plenty of room, and when my mom's best friend divorced her husband for doing drugs, she moved in with her son and two daughters. So now that both of our families were together, it was like all my friends were together. We lived in a caldisac, and my brother and I were friends with almost every house. Her son, I had a crush on though. XD I used to chase him around, but in all honesty, we were best friends.
My mother and father weren't a good match, so when I was seven, they got a divorce. That's the first time I remember crying... but in all honesty, I was barely effected by it.
Shortly after, my mom got cancer. I didn't really know what was going on, so she just was sick. I barely even remember it. I kind of lock memories of my childhood into something like a book. I forget the past chapters and just live in the one I currently am in. I don't often think of my past. So.. yeah, I live with my past experiences, but for the most part I don't remember them.
Oh, then my dad married my mom's now ex-best friend.
Then moved two hours away. We couldn't afford the house so we moved to the city I live in now with my aunt.
That was pretty fucked up. Needless to say, my dad and stepmom just divorced, and I immediately went over to my dad's and trash talked her. I hated her soo much. Not because she screwed my mom over, my mom and dad needed to divorce, they didn't work together. No, I hated her because she constantly was trying to change me all the god damn time. She'd always tell me to blowdry my hair after a shower, even though I hated the way it looked blowdried, etc.
Anyways, yeah. I love you guyz. ^_^
On a side note.. my ex JUST called me. XD WTF.
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Post by child-of-fae on Feb 20, 2008 22:39:08 GMT -5
yeah... my stroy doesn't compare. i basically have no story.
I'm the second out of 4 kids. 5 if you count the dog. My parents are still happily married.
although have no backbone. I was mentally bullied by my best friends for my entire elementary school education. It was a supersmall school, so the people there were the only ones you knew unless you didn't mind going out and getting high on the weekends. I remember wanting to be so "in" with twoof my friends that i willingly trashed my other friends. but it got too much and i told them off the last day of school. thenext year we were all best friends again.
In 5th grade, it got ugly. They were cheerleaders, i wasn't. they had boys who liked them, i didn't. they were skinny and happy, i wasn't. that's when i really started to feel alone. I really started to pick up my image problems at that age. in 6th grade it got bad. i tried to hang myself whe no one was home. i ended up chickening out only to try again about 6 months later. in 7th i swallowed a bunch of pills. i wasn't paying attention to what they were. there wasn't many, and i stopped before it got really bad. i just put the rest away and went downstairs and sat with my cat. i remember having abdominal pain the rest of that night.
I still have horrible issues with self image. I'm "going at my own pace" when it comes to relationships (i'm pretty much the definition of prude). My friends say it's "cute", buti sometimes just get so sick of myself. i posted this on another website, and some people had some really good advice.
i told my mom about my attempts at suicide. she said she'd set me up with a psychiatrist, even though she doesn't think i need one. she still hasn't gotten me an appointment. the thing is, i don't let others see me when i'm not happy. i can't help it. it becomes an automatic response that i can't shut off.
but i basically have nothing to be fucked up about. i know i'm fortunate in life. No one in my family has constant trips to the emergency room (barring stupid accidents i have every once in a while which often include me tripping....lots...) We can afford our house. I have a cell phone and an Ipod. The HS tuition of just my sister and i combined is going to be $40,000 next year. i'm pretty sure that doesn't include bussing. (but she'll be a senior, thank god)
but, whatever. it's nothing.
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Post by Aindel on Feb 21, 2008 0:01:59 GMT -5
I've been lucky as well, for the most part. I've always had good food (whether or not I wanted to eat it, stupid vegetables), a roof over my head. We're definitely not well-off financially, and my grandparents and my aunt really helped out when my younger sisters and I were little. Then when I was my dad got a job transfer, and we moved 2.5 hours away from virtually everything we knew. I know, it's not a huge move, but it was big enough. I hadn't had a lot of friends, but I was fairly close to the few I had. People didn't seem to like me at our new place. I spent most of my recess times sitting on the steps, reading a book. Occasionally, I had one friend who would join me, but I was mostly alone. In grade 8, the girls paid more attention to me, and it seemed like things were going alright. Then, we got to high school, and I was shafted to the side again. I was always good for homework help, but they didn't tend to turn to me for conversation. So I went completely against my shy, introverted, loner character and went to sit with a girl I knew from homeroom who I'd barely ever spoken to before. Thus began my circle of friends. I'm still friends with almost all of them. They fight amongst each other, and sometimes you can't be sure who isn't talking to who, but none of them has ever really been mad at me. My problem lies in relationships and the self-esteem that goes along with it. I don't think that I'm particularly attractive. There are days when I feel that I look pretty good, but on the whole I'm not overly fond of my appearance. It seems that guys aren't, either. I've only had one boyfriend, and that was wasn't much of a relationship. We hung out, watched movies, played board games... the stuff you do with your friends. And that was it. I got a peck on the cheek once, and being the ridiculously shy, nervous person that I am, I could never bring myself to make the first move. Now I think back and wonder if I really liked him as much as I thought I did, or if I was just looking for a break from being "single." Every once in a while, too, I worry about my finances, so much so that I won't sleep. I just keep going over in my head what's going to happen when I graduate, and what happens when I can't get a job, and I have to stay at home, which won't get me a job because there's nothing around me, and I'll be stuck in fast food for the rest of my life. This vicious circle just runs through my head over and over again.
And that's my story. Group hugs!
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Post by Trey on Feb 21, 2008 1:18:07 GMT -5
Aww *hugs*
Yeah, in middle school I'm pretty sure my friends just kept me around so they could make fun of me.
But then I went to high school and only three of them when to the same one I did, I decided that I was going to be a different person, and then I met up with someone from Drama in my PE class.
I joined drama, made lots of friends, and am now completely surrounded by people I like, and are REALLY my friends. ^_^
I have a bad habit with friends though, I'll make a friend, hang out with them like crazy for a bit, then kind of forget about them. Not FORGET, but you know, stop hanging out with them, etc. I don't even realize I'm doing it. I guess it's because I went to so many elementary schools, that I had to get good at making friends, and I only had friends for such a short amount of time, so I guess I'm not too good at retaining them. I mean, they ARE still my friends, we just don't hang out lots. ^_^ I should call some of them.
Spam, let's hang out with BJ and missy.
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Post by Spammich on Feb 21, 2008 17:29:04 GMT -5
I've never made friends easily, I was a bully, a bad on in elementary school. The yarddogs were afraid of me, and I never got into trouble for beating up other kids... Then I closed off from the other kids, like hardcore. I was an outcast who the popular kids wouldn't mess with. I made one guy puke because I gave him a swift kick in the balls for saying something I didn't like.
Middle school I was little crazier, I was wicked to those who picked on me, and the girls I hung out with exalted me in a way. I beat one of them up one day for punching me in the shoulder because I told her there was no such thing as predestined love.
Highschool was a pile of meat. I changed hardcore. Hung out with the druggies, was chill with the Bands, and demanded respect from the coaches an teams. They called me Z.
I regress though, I'm more mellow now, and a lot more picky about the company I keep. I am also, Badass, andpeople know it.
I'm pretty level I guess, though I think that I may get angry too easy at times, and in the end I just hurt myself because of it.
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Post by Spammich on Feb 21, 2008 17:30:06 GMT -5
-hugs all around-
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Post by alba on Feb 21, 2008 18:16:24 GMT -5
I've never been good at making friends either, Spammich, but it's because I'm quiet and insecure. I would probably have no friends at uni if one girl (who is a good friend of mine now) hadn't walked into my room on the first day and invited me into town to get lunch with her. All of my other friends I know through her to some degree (you know, like six degrees of separation? In this case, though, it's only about three degrees).
*hugs all around*
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Post by child-of-fae on Feb 21, 2008 18:56:29 GMT -5
-hugs!-
-runs off to write up the bio reports that have been put off for 3 weeks-
>> << i was never here
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Post by Spammich on Feb 22, 2008 0:56:07 GMT -5
I found it easiest to make friend with the people in my classes who sat next to me, I would pull them into my web xD
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Post by Trey on Feb 22, 2008 2:08:23 GMT -5
*hugz, I do it for the lulz*
I decided a while back to stop being shy. I still am(surprise?), but I hide it behind a layer of forced outgoing. I think I've become a lot less shy because I've forced myself to be outgoing, and I think I'll completely eradicate the shy from my being in a few years. ^_^
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